Hypaethral

(Bleh. I'm horrible with poetry...) You're not the first knight to seek my heart. Nor the first to write lines of romance. He too, his name did not impart, But that's not the way to advance. Anonymity is not what I am seeking I need one that I can truly know. One, whom without speaking, Can say what his mind might show. I thank you kindly for your note, And ask you to grant me pardon. Your feelings shown I can't promote. Yet I beg your heart not to harden. Dear knight, you truly are my friend This friendship I wish to continue on. I hope that this it can transcend. And that it will not be withdrawn.

Okay I'm so sick of beating around the freaking bush. I just want a little romance in my life. I don't care about kisses and that sort of thing. I want cute letters. I want flowers. I want someone to leave a little note. I want an e-mail just to tell me someone is thinking about me. I want some one to serenade me. I want to feel special. Call me high maintenance or girly, I don't care. That's what I want. I care about the physical aspects of relationships, and I don't really care to just sit around watching movies all of the time. I want someone to do something special for me. I want to be surprised. There I said it. I'm girly and a hopeless romantic. Get over it.

Okay this post is mainly to vent a little confusion and frustration, but should the roommate that this is about read it I want her to know that I'm not mad at her and I'm just trying to understand. So one of my roommates has a really big problem with me leaving stuff on the vanity counter. I leave out my straightener, my hair brush, and my cosmetics bag. When she finally gets fed up enough she gathers it up and puts it in my room on the floor. I don't really understand why it's such a big deal. The only thing we use that counter for is to get ready in the morning. If I'm going to use the same things the next morning what is the point in putting the stuff away? I don't put them away for the same reason I don't sleep in my covers. What is the point? When I asked my roommate what the big deal she said that it just really bothered her just like the full trash can bothered me. I don't really see how the two relate. When the trash can is over flowing...

First a letter sent in by a confused young lady: BYU culture struggles to maintain the outdated and patriarchal views that disguise feminine repression through seemingly selfless acts of self-proclaimed “gentlemen.” While walking through campus, I do not see any damsels in distress. I see competent, intelligent, professional women that do not need a man to hold the door, pay for a date or even present a shiny ring in the traditional manner. I have hands, thank you. I do not feel flattered when you awkwardly hold the door open for helpless little me. I also have money. Women who allow men to pay for them on a date are prostituting their worth not only in the relationship, but also in a capitalistic society that strives to provide equal opportunities. Our income is worth just as much as any man’s labor could produce. Finally, I am equally capable of finding my own mate. My agency need not be stifled by the whim of a male who finally decides that I am worthy to be by his side. I, too, can...

I would like to thank the two commenters spoken of before in a previous post. Thank you for your comments. They have helped me more than you could know. Thank you for being my friends and for being patient while I find my way through this.

Okay I love love LOVE getting comments on my blog posts, but I would love to know who these people are. I'm going to draw attention to a few of these ambiguous commenters, and I ask them to tell me who they are (if I know them), or post a link to their blog or blogger profile. WHO ARE YOU!?! Gamspier G.S. Anonymous said... Whitney, I love you. The only power she can have over you is power you give her. You are so strong and wonderful, and you can get through this. Chin up. Remember to breathe and keep going. We know the real you, and we miss you. Just keep fighting this and come back to us as soon as you can.

I can't sleep. Why is that you may ask. Well, my mind is unhappy. It's unhappy with my life. I don't find my life satisfying. I don't find the relationships I'm in satisfying. I don't find my interactions with others satisfying. I don't even find myself satisfying. I think my biggest problem though is that I don't find my relationships satisfying. I don't even feel like it's my fault. I know that's arrogant to think that, but I feel like I try so hard and that no one else does. I want to change my relationships and make them how I want them to be and make them what I see as good and healthy, but I don't know how. It all winds down to my problem with communication I guess. That and trust. I don't communicate what I would like in a relationship and I don't trust those I'm in a relationship with. I don't trust them to respect me or my feelings. I don't know what happened to me. I used to be such a firecrac...

Didn't they always say we were the lucky ones. I guess that we were once, babe, we were once, but luck will leave you cursed, it is a faithless friend, and in the end, when life has got you down, you've got someone here that you can wrap your arms around. So hold on to me tight, hold on to me tonight. We are stronger here together, than we could ever be alone. So hold on to me, don't you ever let me go. There's a thousand ways for things to fall apart, but it's no ones fault, no it's not my fault. Maybe all the plans we made might not work out, but I have no doubt, even though it's hard to see. I've got faith in us, and I believe in you and me. So hold on to me tight. Hold on, I promise it will be alright. Cuz it's you and me together, and baby all we've got is time. So hold on to me, hold on to me tonight. There's so many dreams that we have given up. Take a look at all we've got, and with this kind of love, and what we've got here i...

Click

Whitney really hates her career exploration class. It's not the teacher or the subject. The teacher and his TA are both amazing and really good at what they do. Whitney really enjoys the subjects they cover and the discussions they have. So it's not that. It's the people in the class. Well not all of the people. Rather, it's just a group of boys. They are mean to Whitney. They think she doesn't hear what they say, but she does. They make comments about her her arms and hands. They laugh when Whitney is grouped with a family that has six children expenses. They snicker when Whitney opens the door too forcefully because she forgot that it's not as heavy as the doors outside. She just doesn't think about that. They make comments about Whitney's hobbies and interests. They laugh when Whitney quotes The Enchiridion or talks about the Amish. They make comments about the expression Whitney gets on her face when she's thinking deeply or cont...

Five hundred twenty-five thousand Six hundred minutes, Five hundred twenty-five thousand Moments so dear Five hundred twenty-five thousand Six hundred minutes How do you measure, measure a year? In daylights, in sunsets, in midnights In cups of coffee In inches, in miles, in laughter, in strife In five hundred twenty-five thousand Six hundred minutes How do you measure a year in the life? How about love? How about love? How about love? Measure in love Seasons of love Seasons of love Five hundred twenty-five thousand Six hundred minutes Five hundred twenty-five thousand Journeys to plan Five hundred twenty-five thousand Six hundred minutes How do you measure the life Of a woman or a man? In truths that she learned Or in times that he cried In bridges he burned Or the way that she died It's time now to sing out Tho' the story never ends Let's celebrate Remember a year in the life of friends Remember the love (Oh you got to, got to) Remember the love (Remember the love) Season...

So today whilst sitting in Memorial Hall in the WILK "studying" for humanities I spied a couple on a nearby couch. They were clearly a couple for they were sitting very very close to one another and holding hands and being all coupley. However, they were no talking to one another, they were not looking at one another, instead they both had their phones out and they were both texting the whole time. Come on people!! Wake up and bring your mind back to your body. Be with the people you're with rather than those you are texting. Have a real conversation and real human interaction. Don't become a text-a-holic. Put the phone away and practice your people skills. Okay. Now no more "studying" I need to actually do some studying... For reals now. Wish me luck.