Paradoxical Feeling

Have you ever had that feeling for someone that is just so wonderful? It makes you feel like a million bucks. You're on top of the world and it seems nothing can bring you down. The sun seems brighter and the sky a bit bluer all because you have these feelings. For a moment, life is the best it could ever be.

Then, as you spend time with that person you feel so strongly for, color drains a bit from the sky, the sun dims, and everything seems somewhat lackluster. It's not because those feelings have left you. It's not because that person is anything less than they ever were in your eyes. As a matter of fact, it's those very feelings and the very fact that that person is so amazing that bring you down. You feel all of those wondrous things and you expect them to feel them too. The only problem is that they don't. Either that or they do, but they don't show it. It leaves you with an ache in your chest.

You do all you can to show them what you're feeling. You spend as much time as you can with them. You show them that you want to be close. You give them gifts when you can and serve them even when it may make you worse off. You tell them often how amazing they are to you. You try to get involved in their life. You do all of these things in hopes that they will see that you do have those feelings. You hope that if they feel the same way they won't be afraid to show it because you showed them first. But either they reciprocate those feelings or they do have them, but they don't show them.

That, my friends, is how you can be the happiest you've ever been in the longest time, yet still have nights that, as you try your best to doze off, your eyes leak out the ache left in your chest so that when morning comes you can show that person all over again just how great you feel.