50 things that should not exist...
1. Headaches.
2. Stupid, uncomfortable chairs.
3. People who sharpen their pencils slowly.
4. Stores that check your receipt as you exit, making you feel like a criminal.
5. Mean cats.
6. Clowns.
7. People who cut paper slowly.
8. Disease.
9. Big scary bugs with many legs.
10. Mushrooms.
11. Tomatoes.
12. Food service employees who assume that when you said, "No tomatoes," you were lying.
13. Mysterious sticky spots on desks.
14. Mysterious warm sections in pools.
15. The phrase, "We need to give it 110%."
16. Long sales receipts that include a code at the bottom for an online survey, that, when completed, will enter you for a chance to win a gift card.
17. Blisters on the back of the ankle caused by new shoes.
18. Parody versions of the Happy Birthday Song.
19. Gravel.
20. Leg Hair.
21. Tiny cups of coleslaw served at diners.
22. Remakes of bad horror movies.
23. Knee pit sweat.
24. Greeting cards with glitter.
25. Televised poker.
26. Splinters.
27. Bad actors.
28. Wisdom teeth.
29. The Hills on MTV.
30. Poverty.
31. Fluctuating speed limits on long stretches of heavily patrolled road.
32. Popped collars.
33. People with tattoos written in a language that they cannot speak.
34. Hurricanes.
35. Bad breath.
36. The skin that forms on the top of tomato soup and gravy.
37. DVD commentaries in which the commentators simply describe what is happening on the screen while congratulating themselves.
38. Racism.
39. Park benches that are still wet from the storm that came through about two hours ago.
40. The odd, malformed Peanut M&M's that tastes funky.
41. Product placement visible in most TV shows and movies.
42. Elderly relatives on social networking sites.
43. Bathroom stalls that don't have doors.
44. Any arcade game or toy vending machine that costs more than 50 cents.
45. Prickly bushes that are in close proximity to the basketball court or the bottom of sledding hills.
46. Waiting rooms with a TV smaller than 13 inches.
47. Vomit.
48. Traffic. (Especially if the cause of the traffic is a mystery even after the traffic jam eases up.)
49. People who tell you about the concert that you didn't go to.
50. Dandruff.
2. Stupid, uncomfortable chairs.
3. People who sharpen their pencils slowly.
4. Stores that check your receipt as you exit, making you feel like a criminal.
5. Mean cats.
6. Clowns.
7. People who cut paper slowly.
8. Disease.
9. Big scary bugs with many legs.
10. Mushrooms.
11. Tomatoes.
12. Food service employees who assume that when you said, "No tomatoes," you were lying.
13. Mysterious sticky spots on desks.
14. Mysterious warm sections in pools.
15. The phrase, "We need to give it 110%."
16. Long sales receipts that include a code at the bottom for an online survey, that, when completed, will enter you for a chance to win a gift card.
17. Blisters on the back of the ankle caused by new shoes.
18. Parody versions of the Happy Birthday Song.
19. Gravel.
20. Leg Hair.
21. Tiny cups of coleslaw served at diners.
22. Remakes of bad horror movies.
23. Knee pit sweat.
24. Greeting cards with glitter.
25. Televised poker.
26. Splinters.
27. Bad actors.
28. Wisdom teeth.
29. The Hills on MTV.
30. Poverty.
31. Fluctuating speed limits on long stretches of heavily patrolled road.
32. Popped collars.
33. People with tattoos written in a language that they cannot speak.
34. Hurricanes.
35. Bad breath.
36. The skin that forms on the top of tomato soup and gravy.
37. DVD commentaries in which the commentators simply describe what is happening on the screen while congratulating themselves.
38. Racism.
39. Park benches that are still wet from the storm that came through about two hours ago.
40. The odd, malformed Peanut M&M's that tastes funky.
41. Product placement visible in most TV shows and movies.
42. Elderly relatives on social networking sites.
43. Bathroom stalls that don't have doors.
44. Any arcade game or toy vending machine that costs more than 50 cents.
45. Prickly bushes that are in close proximity to the basketball court or the bottom of sledding hills.
46. Waiting rooms with a TV smaller than 13 inches.
47. Vomit.
48. Traffic. (Especially if the cause of the traffic is a mystery even after the traffic jam eases up.)
49. People who tell you about the concert that you didn't go to.
50. Dandruff.
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